Need feedback on a script

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heruca
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Need feedback on a script

Post by heruca » Tue Dec 18, 2007 2:08 pm

Attached below is a screenplay I wrote a long time ago. It was my first, in fact.

I am hoping to do a complete rewrite of it in 2008, but I was wondering if some you here might want to read this draft and post some feedback, which would be very useful for me to have before I begin working on the rewrite.

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Synopsis: Young Myles Falworth, the headstrong son of an outlawed English lord, must struggle to achieve knighthood, win the hand of his true love, and fight to restore his family's fortune and honor. A tale of chivalry, destiny, and coming-of-age based on Howard Pyle's classic children's novel "Men of Iron".

Genres: Adventure, Drama

Length: 127 pages

Intended audience/rating: PG or PG-13
Attachments
A Paladin's Tale.pdf
(241.14 KiB) Downloaded 353 times
:arrow: Please help spread the word about BRPG and BGE, and never hesitate to tell me how I can make them better suit your gaming needs.

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Kepli
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Post by Kepli » Fri Dec 21, 2007 7:09 pm

Sofar (at page 12 now) no comments from me ... I really like the story sofar. It's not a truly orinigal story (sofar), but one that promisses excitement, intrigue, action and drama ... nice :D

I will try to read more during the coming week :)
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Post by Kepli » Sun Dec 23, 2007 11:30 am

I really like your writing style and the way you describe what the text is about ... reading on ... :wink:
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heruca
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Post by heruca » Sun Dec 23, 2007 11:39 am

I'm happy to hear someone is reading it. 8)

127 pages sounds like a lot, but the screenplay format ensures that there's a lot of white space on every page, so it reads pretty fast compared to a book.
:arrow: Please help spread the word about BRPG and BGE, and never hesitate to tell me how I can make them better suit your gaming needs.

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